Wednesday, December 12, 2012

That time I broke my boob during finals.

I am a hot mess during finals. I make no sense at all. The only way I speak in full sentences is if it has to do with the law and that's if it's a good day. My husband and family claim I'm like this regularly, but it just is heightened during finals time. They also happen to be telling the truth. think they've got jokes.

Case in point: Last semester I got myself so worked up that I broke out in hives. Yeah. It was a total bag of fun.

This semester is proving to be no different.

I got some new winter running gear two weekends ago.

I am determined to run through this Michigan winter and so I hit up the local Marshall's. I scored a jacket for 30 smackeroos, an NB tank top for $7, and running pants for $20. In the runner's world, this is dirt cheap.

The second thing the runners who are reading this post are thinking about is when did she try out the gear and how did it work for ya?

The rest of you are wondering how in the hell I broke my boob and what running gear and being a hot mess at finals time have to do with it.

Well I'll tell you: they go together.

In other words, this is just the long winded back story, before I get to the good part.

Went out last Wednesday. I got on my new gear. I was so excited that I forgot to put on my second bra.

Started my run and I wasn't too happy with the pants. I am a compression pant runner all the way and these pants didn't give as much as I prefer. So my run was off. I kept having to stop and mess with my pants and ain't nobody got time for that.

I wrapped up my run frustrated. I headed into the house and walked into the bathroom. I thought my jacket looked funny, but didn't think anything more about it. Started the shower and started undressing. Turned around and looked in the mirror and I saw it...or rather them.

My boobs were hanging out from under my bra....and had been like that for probably the majority of my run.

Now listen. I know that everyone who is in the itty bitty titty committee thinks big boobs are glamorous and something to be jealous of.

Well, they are not. Because if you're like me, you have to wear two sports bras to work out. In regular bras, you also don't get to wear the pretty colors either. I've lost enough weight that I'm sporting VS bras, but still the options are limited for these bad boys. I only get to wear the pretty colors in sports bras because Target is wonderful and is more than on board with the neon train.

Our little story doesn't end there. I went to the library and about my day. Got home that night and noticed I was sore. Didn't think anything about it. I'm in the "sleep with no bra on" camp and so I went through my routine.


Let's just say I woke up in the middle of the night thinking I was dying. I readjusted and tried to get comfortable, but my left boob was just not having it. I texted my sister asking if you can tear your boobs and went back to bed.

I went throughout my day. I felt better. Went to bed, same thing. I hurt all over again.

This is when I decided to pull a Sheldon Cooper and do an experiment. My constant would be to sleep with a bra on at night for a few days and then my variable would be to sleep without a bra after a few nights.

So that's what I did. I made it a whole three nights before I became too claustrophobic to handle sleeping with a bra on. And on Monday night, I slept without a bra.

YEAH. I'm pretty sure I've broken my left boob. I had an allergic reaction last semester and apparently, this semester I've got a broken boob.

So until finals are over, I'll be sleeping with a bra on at night and hoping like hell I don't break the other one before Friday.

I swear it ain't one thing, it's another. This time the one thing is a boob. A left one to be exact.

Happy Wednesday.

P.S. If in the future, my children come back to read this post, mommy's sorry for writing a whole blog post about her left boob. 


A Nerd and A Free Spirit said...

If it's not one thing it's another. haha. I hope it heals up quickly. I'm one of those itty bitty girls who would say you have rich girl problems. hahaha (-:


Susannah said...

Haaaa! First of all, I love this, "ain't nobody got time for that." Second of all, love the Sheldon reference! Good choice on your experiment. Thirdly, how in the HELL did you break your boob? From it falling out and flapping around whilst running?

JMS said...

Yes- love the "ain't nobody..." Comment!

Caitlin said...

oh my gosh, i'm sooo sorry for that poor boob of ur's!! well, stay sane during those finals and how in the world u michiganers survive over there is beyond me, i complain when it's under 40! :P

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Hi y'all! The name's Samantha. You can call me Sam if you like. I am a lover to a boy I met at Falls Creek in the summer of 2005, that is a student of Jesus, a Sooner born and Sooner bred and when I die I'll be Sooner dead, Democrat by party, blonde to the core, and oldies but goodies kind of girl.
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