Monday, August 27, 2012

On Friendship.

In high school, I had two girls I could count on to be good friends. The rest got on my nerves and hurt my feelings to the point that I refused to deal with them. I wound up having a ton of great guy friends that to this day I could call on and pick up right where we left off. I get to see a bunch of them this fall and I am really excited about it!!

In college, I met girls who taught me what friendship among girls should look like. I consider these girls my people and fellow bus riders and like the guys mentioned above to this day, I could call them anytime or anywhere and they would be there for me.

After college, I went through a drought period of making friends IRL. But I made a core group of pals through blogging. These friendships have been a blast and like the above groups, I know I can count on them.

In law school, I have a similar core group of friends. A mixture of guys and gals that are wonderful people who will be part of our lives forever.

However, B and I are in a weird place in our lives.

Weird, but very happy.

We're happy to be with each other.
We're happy to not have kids at this point.
We're happy to still have our freedom to not have to worry about getting a babysitter.
We're happy that it's just us for now.

Sometimes though it's hard to connect in friendships.

We have married friends, but they have kids. So sometimes, they're limited on what they can do or want to do.

We have one set of married friends that are in the same situation we're in, but we don't want to overwhelm them by hanging out regularly. 

We also have single friends, or friends that are in serious relationships, but the separation that happens naturally is they don't go home with the person like we do. It's just different.

We spend the majority of our time with the last two groups.

Outside of our married buddies, I feel like the odd man out in a lot of situations because I don't have similar worries of finding "The One" anymore, going on first dates, or roommate issues. I've found my one, my first date was seven years ago and my last roommate before B was my sister.

But at the same time, I'm still a girl who loves to discuss the latest celeb gossip, a good mani-pedi, a good shopping trip, a good chat about life, and a good meal among friends.

Some people will bond more naturally because they're going through similar situations in their lives. I can't help that from happening and nor do I want to prevent it.

I just don't want to be left out either.

I feel like I give 110% and still feel left out or like I don't receive the same effort in return.

Like I said, it's just weird. In every phase of my life, until now, I've shared similar life experiences and was in the same place as everyone else.

I'm not sure what to do either.

Hope y'all have a great week and I hope someone out there can relate too.

Happy Monday.



MK said...

I totally get what you're saying. We're one of the last of our married, couple friends to have a baby - which we're fine with! But I don't have a core group of friends anymore and it's sad and hard to deal with.

A Nerd and A Free Spirit said...

OMG. EVERYONE is having kids. WE aren't yet - we just aren't ready yet. We went to a church party for our sunday school this weekend.... and the class that was once basically kidless is not like a Chick Fil A play area. I love kids and all, but I can only talk about diapers, and breast feeding, and Just Between Friends sales for so long. It is frustrating, because I begin to feel like I don't fit in.


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Hi y'all! The name's Samantha. You can call me Sam if you like. I am a lover to a boy I met at Falls Creek in the summer of 2005, that is a student of Jesus, a Sooner born and Sooner bred and when I die I'll be Sooner dead, Democrat by party, blonde to the core, and oldies but goodies kind of girl.
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