Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Wednesday is "Skinny Girls" Day.

Skinny Girls: a female who wears a size 0-12; some are mean and some are nice; 

Dear Skinny Girls (more specifically the mean ones),

I should tell you first that I am NOT a skinny girl. I met my honey and let things go. This is of my own doing and I am currently working on this problem. I also am fortunate enough to have parents who instilled in me a good sense of self worth so I don't struggle with a low self-esteem with the exception of a few frump days here and there.

That being said, I have a serious bone to pick with you.

I really get tired of hearing about how "fat" you supposedly are.

In fact, if I hear it again, I just might scream. 

We all have areas we'd like to work on, I'm certain of that. For example I hate my tummy and arms the most. However, blanket statements like "I'm such a fatty" or "I'm so fat" from your mouths are quite frankly, insulting and demeaning.

It's bad enough that society (that includes everyone even yourself) has allowed the skinny girl image to be projected onto our demographic as acceptable which has caused bulemia, anorexia, gluttony and other disorders and problems to go to a whole other level of severity.

Us fat girls don't need your help.

So hear me when I say this:

YOU. ARE. NOT. FAT.

YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL AND MADE IN GOD'S IMAGE.

I have theories about why things are like for instance, I think the problem with kids today is no discipline and no dodgeball. That's another story for another day. The point in all of this is that I think in our modern society we sometimes forget that simple theories from the days of yore often work just as good as the current ones, I'd go so far as to say they work the best actually.

So here's my take on mean skinny girls.

If skinny girls weren't so worried about being Snow White, and get busy on being Cinderella's, then life would be a lot better.

You see, skinny girls are like Snow White's in that they like to look at themselves in the mirror on a regular basis. It's all they think about, night and day. And if something is on your mind all the time, then it is bound to come out of your mouth. Thus, the release of the nasty blanket statements mentioned above. The problem is that when you make these statements you've forgotten to look outside the mirror and yourself to see that there are other people in this world who struggle with this issue a LOT. AND when you say those awful things about yourself, you disallow other girls who are bigger than you to struggle with the same thing. If  you're "huge" or "fat", then what are they?

A freaking ginormo monster fatty?

But who wants to say that because those words are scary and borderline cause for concern. So instead some girls who are bigger keep it inside because if the skinny Snow White is fat, then I must be huge.

It feeds the cycle and before you know it, girlfriend has gained another 10-20 pounds because she eats in shame so she doesn't have to deal with her problem.

Am I saying you shouldn't talk about your struggle areas? NO. That is not what I am saying.

I am saying that maybe the skinny girls should be more like Cinderella.

Now Cinderella, she lived a hard life and as a result of her hard life, was aware of her surroundings. This is typically your average fat girl and here's why.

When the skinny girl says, "I'm fat", the fat girl looks around to avoid the subject and also so she doesn't have to look in the mirror to be reminded that she is fat again. In the process of looking around, Cinderella discovers, you know what my life isn't so bad. Yes I'm a little bigger than I want to be, but my life could be worse.

If she is in the right surroundings and gets her bearings and gets herself to the nearest gym, she has a shot of becoming part of the skinny girl group and for being comfortable in her skin.

Most of the time, she does not forget where she came from because she worked hard to get to where she is.

Now before you say I'm sticking up for the fat girls and totally dismissing the nice skinny girls, stop yourself.

I have been near all three situations in my life at some point. We all have.

But the biggest thing issue is that when blanket statements are made, communication is cut off.

And everyone knows that when you talk about things everything gets better.

So let's be kind to one another for gosh sakes!!

Much love,

Sam

9 comments:

brown eyed girl said...

I'm still learning the difference between I FEEL fat and I AM fat.

Does that differentiation make a difference for you?

I somehow feel like because I was 25 pounds heavier, I'm still learning the difference in how I appear. Because based on your size chart, I am a skinny girl, but in my head, I'm still a size 14. If that makes sense!

Katie said...

I am not a skinny girl either (but damn-it I WILL BE)--and I have always hated those tiny skinny girls who make those statements, "Ughhh I AM FAT". its like, REALLY? How rude.

Susannah said...

Snap! Agreed!

And, I agree with BEG-I feel the same way and it's a hard image to shed. :D

Mrs. D said...

I pretty much agree with you. It makes me so mad to hear a girl fifty pounds lighter than me call themselves fat. Once I make it to skinny girl status, I will never be so rude!

Gina said...

I am skinny. I admit it.

But I've been guilty of saying that I am fat, but ONLY after having my babies.

Do you still love me?

Brittany said...

Ahmen sister friend!!

A Nerd and A Free Spirit said...

Okay. I'm a skinny girl. Pretty darn skinny, actually, we're talking I weigh less than 110. But, I can also say, there are days when I FEEL fat. Just like you mentioned you have "frumpy" days, skinny girls have those too. Because today I treated my body like an amusement park and had a coke freeze, brownies, chili, and pasta. And I have FELT fat. And I'm not.

I do think you are right that skinny girls need to be careful what they say, especially around larger girls, but skinny girls can feel fat, just like bigger girls can.

Plus, I used to weigh 30 pounds more than I do now, so I still have a little bit of a complex. (-:

Thanks for sharing!

~K

~Haley~ said...

I am so glad you wrote this... I struggle a lot between saying I am fat & feeling fat. I had 2 best friends with eating disorders in high school and even though I've been out of there for 6 years, I feel like their mindset stuck to me a little. I am considered a skinny girl, and I know I'm not that much overweight. It's my mind falling into the media's portrayal of fat vs skinny, and even though I know that sometimes, it's a struggle to know that I am beautiful and worthy, even if I am a little overweight for my height.

Brittany Ann said...

I always, always feel fat. I struggled with exercise bulimia my whole young adult life. I still do, in my weaker moments.

Pregnancy itself has rendered this even worse in me. I'm TERRIFIED my younger, thinner body will be gone for good.

That being said, preach on!

Negative self-hatred comments are painful to all womankind.

It's a hard line to walk.

I internalize it 99-percent of the time. Not healthy. But way better for the rest of womankind.

You go, girl!

And, listen, you are beautiful! I hope you know that.

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Hi y'all! The name's Samantha. You can call me Sam if you like. I am a lover to a boy I met at Falls Creek in the summer of 2005, that is a student of Jesus, a Sooner born and Sooner bred and when I die I'll be Sooner dead, Democrat by party, blonde to the core, and oldies but goodies kind of girl.
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