Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Wednesday is "Scissors and Knives" Day

Scissors: –noun; 1.(used with a singular or plural verb) a cutting instrument for paper, cloth, etc., consisting of two blades, each having a ring-shaped handle, that are so pivoted together that their sharp edges work one against the other (often used with pair of).

Knife: –noun ; 1. an instrument for cutting, consisting essentially of a thin, sharp-edged, metal blade fitted with a handle.

Yesterday, my bra I ordered about two weekends ago finally arrived to our house. I went to open it and my husband handed me his knife. I didn't exactly ask for his knife, he just handed it to me because that is what he does as a guy.

I don't like to use knives because if you open it you have to close it. Apparently it is bad luck if you don't. And it is also bad luck to have someone open it for you to use it and then hand it back to them. So I usually go for scissors. Plus I have a slight theory about why a girl feels better about using scissors anyway.

Women use scissors because as little girls typically their daddies and mommies do not want them to have anything to do with a knife. They are to be treated as delicate little things and for the most part have no use for a knife except to be used at a dinner table. Obviously there are some exceptions. These girls are known as tomboys. Occasionally, said tomboys use their own knife for hunting, fishing, etc. But for the most part, girls use scissors. Scissors require precision and since girls are hard-wired for details, scissors work out well for them.

Men use knives because as little boys typically their daddies and mommies want them to be rough and tumbled creatures. Little boys fish, hunt, play sports, etc. that call for them to use a knife. It is just one of those things that a boy is supposed to know how to use if his parents are traditional.

So for Brandon to hand me his knife was nothing out of the ordinary for him. He has two brothers so he doesn't know about girls. He just figures for the most part that b/c in his family they used knives that every family uses like they do too. He thinks it is cool. Freud would think this was a sign of Brandon showing phallicism. The knife is a phallic symbol. But I digress and for the most part don't follow Freud's doctrine so we'll be moving along.

The point of the matter is this. I don't like using knives because I can't typically close them.

Scissors are easier.

And to top it all off , they sent me the wrong bra size and color!

Poo on that.

No comments:

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...


Hi y'all! The name's Samantha. You can call me Sam if you like. I am a lover to a boy I met at Falls Creek in the summer of 2005, that is a student of Jesus, a Sooner born and Sooner bred and when I die I'll be Sooner dead, Democrat by party, blonde to the core, and oldies but goodies kind of girl.
The Ruby Turtle Hippie Times
<div class="grab-button" margin: 0 auto;"><a href="" rel="nofollow"><img src="" alt="The Ruby Turtle Hippie Times"></div>

Designed By:

Munchkin Land Designs
Designed by Munchkin Land Designs • Copyright 2015 • All Rights Reserved