Thursday, October 16, 2008

I don't flip people off. It's called manners, thank you.

On the road, I have been known to have a slight case of road rage. However, that was not the case yesterday. I'm also getting ahead of myself. Let me start the beginning....

For the first two weeks in October, the bridge that I cross when I come to work was reduced down to one lane. I had to add an extra ten minutes to my commute because of merged traffic. Now Oklahoma has a law that at a certain point you have to merge. In fact, there is a sign that says, "State Law MERGE NOW." Obviously it is a traffic violation if you don't. Well, some people before this sign like to play teacher and sit out in the middle of the lane so no one can pass them. Remember how a person could get into trouble for cutting in the lunch line when we were younger? Well this is the same concept except we haven't passed the Merge Now sign. I understand that I am trying to get to work just like everyone else, but I have to be at work at 8am. No exceptions. I do not run late. And my boss does not want me to run late either. So why is it necessary for you to act like an 8 year old?

Now in my line of work, I see officers of the law on a daily basis. It happened that a Hi-Po would be my source of help on this particular day. I asked my question about the wanna-be teachers. Of course he wanted to know why I couldn't just go ahead and merge like everyeone else. I said I understood where he was coming from, but they could be a major source of traffic accidents too. So he explained that it would be an obstruciton of traffic and that they could be ticketed. We both went about our day. Two days later he came back to the office and told me that he issued three tickets to people about what we talked about two days earlier.

Now I told you that story to tell you this story...

Yesterday I was on my way home from work. I was the only person in the left lane. There was no one in front of me for a football field and the same in the back. Now I understand that I really shouldn't have been sitting in the left lane. After all, it is a passing lane, but I was by myself, with two hundred yards around me and I was doing 70. So it wasn't like I was putt-putting along.

I see this Chrysler SUV come up behind me. But she was coming so fast, I didn't want to move to the right lane because I thought she might go around me and it could have caused an accident. Plus for some reason, on this side of the state people do not know how to use their turning signal. So it was a good possibility that she was going to pass without letting me know about it. So I sat still.

Well she continued to ride my bumper.

Then she flashed her lights at me.

Yes there was still no one around us.

So I moved over to appease her royal highness.

She zooms passed me and then the bitty FLIPPED ME OFF! She really gave me the bird. I will be the first to admit that I do struggle with the occasional curse word, but I do NOT say THAT word in any form or fashion, thank you very much. I know I could have moved over, but really there was no one around us and she was the one driving like a bat out of Hades. Not me.

Now I'm pretty sure she could have used her brain if she wanted to, but then I saw her license plate and saw she was from Iowa. So that proved otherwise to me. So I did what any self-respecting Southern lady would do. I called her out on her manners literally. I waited for justice to be served.

About 3-4 minutes later, I was coming over the top of another hill when I felt a shift in the traffic. I braced myself because I thought I was coming up on an accident.

Then I came over the hill and what to my wondering eye should appear, but a Hi-Po with a Chrysler SUV pulled over for her speeding.

As I drove past, I waved because in the South we wave at each other when we say hello.

I don't flip people off. It's called manners, thank you Iowa.


emmy said...

This is a flippin' fantastic story. OMGosh, amazing!

emmy said...

P.S. I'm seeing Blonde on Saturday.

Jessica said...

thank you for that.

mere... said...

you just made me smile...i approve.

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Hi y'all! The name's Samantha. You can call me Sam if you like. I am a lover to a boy I met at Falls Creek in the summer of 2005, that is a student of Jesus, a Sooner born and Sooner bred and when I die I'll be Sooner dead, Democrat by party, blonde to the core, and oldies but goodies kind of girl.
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